My name is Vadik. Surname is not important. I’m tall Russian male. Thirty years old. Good looking. Got big penis.
I came to America two years ago. I’m good guy. Not like in stupid Hollywood movies where Russian man always the bad guy. I work in grocery shop. Not Russian mafia. I pack bags for people who come buy stuff. Not pay much, but job is good. Job is start. And I love job at grocery shop. Girls there they love me because they say I look like blonde and tall Tom Cruise and I got big penis.
Not believe I am good guy? Fine. I tell you story now. One day, I am on break at grocery shop job. Nice sunny day in California. Girls all nice. I stand by cheap motorcycle I got as loan from other Russian friend who also good guy and smoke cigarette.
I see something. Girl, beautiful, long black hair, white skin like snow, and eyes as green as leaves on tree.
A van stops. White. Door opens. Four guys with masks get out and take girl. Van drives away.
I make choice. I throw away cigarette and climb on motorcycle. The chase is ten minutes. Lots of cars on street to look out for but in those ten minutes, I catch white van with beautiful girl. I stop next to them.
No mask on driver, who is white, says to Vadik, “What the hell you looking at you tall Russian looking mofo?”
I say to driver, “You let girl go and you let girl go now. I am Russian mafia. I will find you and everyone of family and chop everyone up. Unless you give me girl.”
Driver looks scared. Silent for minute. Then says, “Fine. You can have the damn girl you Russian mofo. Yo, open the door back there and let that skinny ass bitch go.”
Girl gets out. Van drives off.
“Thank you for saving my life,” girl says and kisses me on cheek. “Who are you?”
“My name is Vadik. Surname is not important. I’m good guy. Not like in stupid Hollywood movies where Russian man always the bad guy. See I saved your life and you are American girl.”
“Thank you for saving my life, Vadik. I’m Kimberly.”
“Like pretty girl that is pink Power Ranger.”
Kimberly laughs. This American girl was worth saving.
So, what was story about? I tell you. They say don’t judge book by cover. I say yes. True. But also, sometimes it good be judged like cover on book. This is how I found American wife called Kimberly.
Image used found on Pixabay.